Just a little Freak-Out...

Seriously.
I stopped crying.
And it only lasted for about a minute or two...
Though, okay, so I'm still thinking about it...

Alright, here's what's going through my head right now.

Yesterday, James came over. Not to see me, though he did, of course, and we chatted a little, but no, he came to see my Mom. See, he got this new job selling knives --salesman? whoa-- and he's been at it a little under two weeks and wanted to give his spiel to Mom to practice, and to my surprise, he's good at it, he's funny, engaging, whatever...they're good knives, too, and it's cool the things you can do with them. There's also a pair of shears that can cut through ANYTHING! To prove it, he cut a penny.
How cool is that?
Of course, he hadn't done that one when I was in the room, cuz I was doing other things, but when I came back in, I admired it, and, since Mom was out of the room taking care of the baby for a moment or something, he took time to show me a trick as well...
He made a flower out of the penny and gave it to me.
And HELLO, what does that mean?
He's never given me a flower before, not while we were dating, and now this?
And he seems happy to see me, which is nice, but I'm confused anyway.
And a little scared too...
Wanna know a secret?
I haven't dreamed of him in two weeks.
And months of nightmares, I've gone back to my normal dreaming habits.
And I'm glad, though a little bit wondering what made it stop, but this is good, it's nice to finally get over someone after...six months?
But then he comes over and confuses me...
And we have last night...
(Insert curse word here!)
And, okay, I know he's not good for me and all, and I've gone over all the reasons in my head, but a girl gets lonely and likes to be admired and starts thinking...
STOP THINKING!!
Wanna know why?
This morning I go on my Facebook account, and big and bold on the side column, guess what's new?
James is in a relationship.
Okay.
Just breathe.
I don't need to freak out.
I mean, I've been telling myself all the reasons why we shouldn't get back together anyway, so it's okay, right?
Right...
But what was with giving me a flower?
The jerk really is a nice guy, I guess...
Whatever, so I'm okay, just a little stunned, thrown for a loop.
But I'm reacting way better than I did when I found out the priest had a girlfriend, so I think this is okay...it's okay...
Say a prayer just in case my brain decides it's not?

Hope all's well with you...